You probably all know one of these kinds of moms. The mom whose child can do no wrong. The mom who shows up at your door for every little spat and blames everyone and everything but their own child. They will avoid any situation where their kid will have difficulties. These moms are not doing anything but hurting their kid! Kids today are not learning to deal with life. What will they do when Mommy isn't right at their side anymore? How will they take care of themselves? Of course every mom wants to support their children, but this isn't support. This is coddling. An important role of a parent is to teach their children how to grow up and live in the real world. I will admit I am probably a little too harsh on my kids at times. I am the first to say "what did you do?". I think it is about getting the facts and teaching your kids how to deal with situations and not being in denial. It is scary to think what these kids will get away with as teenagers having their parents wrapped around their fingers. What do you think? Do you know parents like this?
UPDATE: A Canadian network is airing a show tonight on CBC about hyper-parenting. This is a documentary about Hyper-Parenting and Coddled Kids and airs tonight on CBC. If you are able to watch this, don't miss it!
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7 opinions:
I haven't the pleasure of meeting any parents like this yet, but my oldest dd is just in 1st grade. Boy, I hope I'm not like that...there have been times that kids have played at my house and they don't treat my little one the best. But, we've been working on her standing up for herself instead of being a door mat. She's a gentle soul and people pleaser, which is wonderful. Just like her to stand up for herself so mom/dad don't have to stand up except for major things.
serious problems waiting to happen . . . sooner or later you have to let them be responsible for their actions both good and bad. In the meantime, everyone seems to understand it the parents.
Kristin
My oldest daughter dated one when they were teenagers. It was really bad.
I remember this, when a friends daughter did have her parents wrapped, and she took off, before she even finished high school. And, returned with a child. No RULES, so they were free to do as they pleased.
I have a family member like this and it is impossibly hard. Her daughter (same exact age as my oldest) is never in the wrong, everyone else must change their behavior to conform to her daughter's outrageous actions. It's sad because we've had to really pull away from a lot of family functions as a result. And yes, I probably take the route you often take, which is "what did YOU do to escalate what happened?" But I do believe in accountability and that's what I try to teach without hammering it too much. Sometimes other little kids are absolute monsters (typically they're the ones with the moms we are discussing). I am thrilled to have found this blog!
As a non-mom, I think it is hysterical how moms put their child on a pedestal and talk about how soon they started doing something, how smart they are compared to others their age. It is the same thing I do about my dog....except they get a glazed look over their eyes.
Argh! Can't stand these moms, and don't have time for them. I'm laughing b/c I basically just wrote a post talking about almost the same thing... but more about the friends "as a couple". I think it's entitled "Pat on my back".
I DID forget the family who NEVER think it's their kids' fault. However, luckily, I weeded most of them out. My problem is more the discipline even when they DO realize and admit it's their fault.
I, too, say, "What did you do!!?!?!?". Love connecting w/you!
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