Recently while chaperoning my 5th grade daughter's school dance I endured quite an entertaining night. My job was to watch guard at the door to make sure no one tried to escape and keep an eye on the bathrooms. I thought, this will be a boring night. I was kind of hoping to hang out near the dance floor and do a little eavesdropping on my daughter in there. Well, it was anything but boring. Never did I imagine the drama I would see at an elementary school dance. One of the other moms chaperoning had been doing this for a while told me to give it about an hour and then the show will start. She was right. About an hour into the night out came the girls. First of all I have to say I was a bit appalled at the way some of these girls were dressed. Fifth grade girls with makeup (obvious makeup), somewhat revealing clothes, and tight pants. Some even wearing high heels.
Back to the drama of the evening. It started with girls heading to the bathroom. How many times do these girls really need to use the bathroom? Next, a girl in tears running to the bathroom. Closely behind, two more girls running to her rescue. A few minutes later another girl quickly running toward the door in tears with her mascara running down her face. This went on for about two hours. These girls were upset that another friend was dancing with "her boyfriend" or flirting with "the boyfriend". Are you serious? These girls are in 5th grade. They insisted they needed air and needed to get outside. They had a whole group of girls consoling them in the bathroom. They were whipping out their cell phones to inform another friend of the story all while sobbing. This is for real and to me this is insane. These girls are kids. Why are they not living it up as kids and having a great time instead of worrying about these things? I cannot imagine what these girls will be like as they progress through middle school and high school, not to mention adulthood. Let me add one more thing...not one boy passed through my direction at the dance. They were all living it up and having a grand old time.
Why do you think these girls are so caught up in drama at this age?
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12 opinions:
I kind of feel like a big part of it is our fault as parents. How many of us have talked about how our little 5 year old has a boyfriend? Girls are encouraged to dress and act like miniature adults from the time they're out of diapers. And instead of talking to our girls about being friends with guys, we're talking about how cute boys are, and who our daughters have a crush on. I feel like I've tried to do the opposite with my girls. My oldest is 15 and has not gone boy-crazy so far....we'll see what happens with my now 9 year old. :)
ps. I'm talking about Teens, Sex, and the Media tomorrow. I'm a little nervous!
My youngest is in 5th grade and it is CRAZY! I don't get it. Every day she has a story about who broke up with who and now so-and-so wont't talk to this person because they took the others side. O.M.G. I don't get it. I was so not boy crazy at her age. I think part of the problem is that girls are developing faster now than when we were young. My 5th grader looks like she's 16 and people expect her to behave like it. You could not tell she just turned 11 when you look at her and most of her friends are like that as well.
Hormones, hormones, HORMONES!! Research has proven that puberty is occurring earlier and earlier and so those emotional reactions you and I remember happening later on in childhood are now happening to the typical 5th grader.
Well, hate to say it but with TV, movies, gossip, celebrity and all of the things I LOVE, kids get into the drama and gossip sooo much earlier than we did. It's the price we pay for all the extras and technology and FUN!
Kat
http://todayscliche.com
My girls are both teens and in HS and they avoid school dances like the plague - because of the drama and the grinding! It starts early and it never seems to go away.
I can't imagine! We had one dance at the end of fifth grade that was a kid and parent event. I danced with my dad! Our drama didn't start until sixth grade. It wasn't drama really, just a bunch of wall flowers too afraid to dance.
I grew up in a very rural area. I didn't have cable. I have no idea what could cause such a difference!
We didn't even HAVE dances in 5th grade (our first one was in 8th).
Sure, hormones play into it, but as parents, we definitely need to help maintain reasonable boundaries on things like dating and relationships.
I just can't imagine being this caught up in boys in 5th grade.
I have been constantly pondering why kids are starting out younger and younger to want to 'grow up' so fast...I think its also hard to prevent them from doing so when all the other kids they go to school with are constantly behaving this way and everything on tv is this way...but I am just sad that they can't be innocent and just have fun and live their life when this is suppose to be the time where they can actually be care free...
For some reason, I think girls are becoming more concerned with growing up fast. I don't know if this is because of the way they were raised or what - I'm not a parent, so I wouldn't know. I'm almost 20 years old, and I don't know if that's too young for most people to start wishing they had their childhoods back, but sometimes I get that reminiscent feeling that makes me long for those days I'd holler through the woods for my cousins to come jump on my trampoline and racing four-wheelers with my friend through the field in her back yard. I have a thing for childhood in the real deal kind of way. Where all your concerned about is adventure and out performing the boys who think you're gross and have cooties. It makes me sad to think of girls this way. I remember when my cousin Shea was about 8 or 9, she showed signs to me that she was concerned with gaining weight. I know that was probably because her younger sister, Ali - my other cousin - is overweight, but still. It made me sad...
Stopping by from Lady Bloggers. Love your site. :)
Ahhhh I blame the media. And teen-themed TV and movies. Even my 5-yr-old (YES FIVE) has her tenage brat moments... we have had to cut off her supply! No HSM or hannah M for her no more, baby! She seems to be reverting to 5-yr-old age appropriate behaviour. Phew. Yep. Sharpay, you have a lot to answer for!
x
I have to say - I remember the drama from that age - but I also see a whole lot of drama among my female thirty-something friends... so I don't know if it's particular to that age, or particular to certain women (not saying I'm not one of them)!
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