Confession...I have shared my bed with my babies. I don't regularly use the term co-sleeping or family bed, but yes, I have brought my babies into my bed at night. With my first it was a matter of 'OMG, how do I get him to sleep?'. Bringing him our bed worked. I was always careful not to put him near the pillows but truthfully I was unaware of the real danger. I nursed all three of my kids. There were many nights when I was so tired that I would fall asleep while nursing them. I would wake up an hour or so later and there the baby was, still there sound asleep.
When I think back to this and see reports on how dangerous this is it really freaks me out. Now that I am more aware of the dangers would I still do this? Well, I don't plan on having any more kids so I will never know, but remembering that tired, utterly exhausted feeling....almost a feeling of not thinking straight...I really don't know.
I have mixed feelings on this. On one hand some experts say that it is good for the baby to sleep near the mother. On the other hand experts say flat out absolutely not, no way, no how should you bring your baby to bed with you. I think there are a lot of factors involved here, but how do you feel?
Do you think it should be illegal for babies to sleep in your bed? Do you think that falling asleep during nursing your baby should possibly put you in jail?
Watch this video from Fox News and then let me know what you think. I don't regularly post videos or even pictures, but this one I feel you need to see.
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13 opinions:
I don't think it should be illegal. I think that's going to far. If that's illegal, then it should also be illegal to sell/produce things like crib bumpers and stuffed animals to put in cribs...I guess actually putting those things in the cribs should be illegal as well. They can cause suffocation also.
There are so many things out there that can harm/kill a baby. We can't make everything illegal. Parents just need to use good judgement.
We're one of the few countries that do NOT encourage co-sleeping. And for every anti-co-sleeping study, there's one that is pro-co-sleeping.
Heck, less than 30 years ag parents were taught to put their babies to sleep on their stomachs. Now that's a big no-no. Who knows? By the time our kids are having babies they could be telling everyone that co-sleeping is the healthy & safe way to go.
I don't think it should necessarily be illegal, but I do think some parents don't realize the real dangers. It isn't even advised to put blankets in cribs, but then 2 adults, comforters, sheets, pillows and pillow-top mattresses for co-sleeping??? Not to mention the rolling-on-top-of-your-baby risk.
We had our oldest in a kids' hospital for some procedure and there was another family there that day. The dad had rolled onto his daughter during the night and broke some bone of hers! He was devastated.
No, it shouldn't be illegal. Parents just have to use good judgement. I didn't bring either one of my children into my bed. I heard too many horror stories of them never wanting to leave! When I nursed my daughter in the midlde of the night, we went into the living room and lay on the couch.
I don't think it should be illegal either. My 2.5 year old slept in the bed with me (daddy slept on the couch) the first 2 months - then I moved him into his crib. Daddy worked a lot, so it was just me and the baby with my daughter in school. I would not have made it out alive if he didn't sleep with me! I did have one of those co-sleeper box type things to put him in though.
Illegal? Of course not. Should all parents do this? Of course not. I co slept with my daughter, because it was only me and her at home and I was breast-feeding. What I did was slept a little bit lower than her, used thin sheets, and didn't use any pillows. I'm a light sleeper so every little move she made woke me.
My only reason for deciding that I am not going to co-sleep with my next child is that now their father is in the bed and although he is a light sleeper, he' a big guy, and there's definitely not enough space on the bed.
I do agree with the whole bottle-fed and breast-feeding aspect that was talked about in the video. Although there is a connect with baby and mother no matter how they are fed, breast-fed mothers are just more aware of when it's time for baby it eat (they have to actually feel it in their breasts lol) and are more adjusted to the babies movements around them.
But like I said earlier, I took a lot of precautions to make co-sleeping safe with my baby. I loved co-sleeping with my first baby, but will not do it again.
Great post, Dalia!
It shouldn't be illegal. Of course it isn't for everyone and you should try to get your baby to sleep on his/her own but us Mommy's need at least SOME sleep. Do people expect us to function on no sleep at all? Some babies won't sleep on their own, it's not wrong for a mother to want to comfort her baby and catch some zzzz's.
Ok, I'm not even through the entire video and already have my hackles raised.
First of all, has anyone else been hearing "BACK to sleep" when it comes to infants? So what's with the short clip of the baby sleeping ON ITS STOMACH - just before the "expert" comes on? No, no, no. Babies sleep on their backs now - though in the 1970s, babies were put to sleep on their stomachs. My brothers were (and survived).
Now, I think that accidents do happen. I also took my babies to bed simply so I could maybe get one hour's sleep for myself. I was very very careful to keep pillows out of the way, excess blankets, etc.
I do not think taking babies to bed should be illegal - that is a judgement call that only the parents can make. I personally do not want a child sleeping in my bed for the first three or however many years of his life, but others find this a wonderful thing. That is their (and my own) judgement call. To tell all parents they cannot take their infant to bed? Who is going to monitor this and police it? And why should this be illegal? Isn't it devastating enough that the infant died, so now we have to put the parent/s on trial?
Definitely not illegal! I hate all the intrusion of governments telling us how to parent... The kids who would benefit from parenting legislation are likely to be those ones with parents who would break the laws anyway.
Having said that - I have never co-slept with my babies (until they were over one, and then only if they are very sick and just need TLC). It is not that I didn't try, but I found I just slept worse with a baby in bed. I was too worried about pillows, crushing them, etc. I prefer a bassinet NEXT to the bed when bubs are small (easy access for nursing), but then in their own rooms after 6 months or so.
I think that people who can't wake up and smother they're child must be on drugs or something. I was exhausted, but when that baby cried or sighed, I was awake. There was a different level of sleep (aka very light, bad sleep) when she was in my bed.
I don't think you should take Tylenol PM and then co-sleep, but you have to have room to care for your baby how you see fit. I think awareness (which we have) will help mothers make choices that will help them raise happy healthy babies.
most moms probably do it for a mintute or two at some point! Shouldnt be illegal.
That's so interesting. I would be totally against passing that into law, because for so many parents it works so beautifully, especially when babies are unsettled or ill.
We didn't bed-share all the time, but from time to time it certainly made life bearable. But then, I was breastfeeding all of them too.
Interesting.
But OH i just hate it when the PC brigade get involved and slap a big one-size-fits-all label on something.
Very annoying.
x
My eldest son slept with us until he was four. Never, not once did we experience any problems. We also have a king size bed so that helped. Now our two yr old sleeps with us. When he's four he can go to his own bed. I slept with my parents until i was five, and I'm fine. We come from a latin culture, and co-sleeping is perfectly normal. Has been and I predict will continue to be. Many people have done this out of necessity when there is not enough space for an extra bed or crib as was the case when I was a child and we shared an apartment with my grandparents.
To even suggest that co-sleeping become illegal is absurd.
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